notes

I think what I will do with this blog thing for now is post some of my autobio's I wrote. These were born in a college class called "Writing Your Life." I took it two semesters in a row, Fall1995, Spring 1996. The formatt is borrowed, then I adjusted my style to fit into it. The person was a former student who called his "Snap Shots." They were brief stories that were of a moment in his life, not an expanded verson over time. I saw them as a "feeling", one that spoke volumes of information. For mine, I use them as a moment or event in my life. Like viewing an action photo, or a film teaser, one that a person can observe another, or me, and those around them, but also to know their thoughts and feelings. All of this for that moment, that space and time and for that event. I call mine "photograhs" becuase they are a combinations of events centered around one event or action or reaction to that event. This will be a brief look into my life, yet provide volumes of information and reasoning of who and I why I am and who I was back then. Did I do the right things? Could I have done better? None of that is in the stories, only what happened and how I reacted and felt. Yet, all of that is in the stories and to ask why and how and what is the reason for my writing them. These have helped me to heal and grow and to understand that yes, I could have done better, or no, I did the best I could, and yet, the best I could was the best I could then, and not now. Do I reget? No, certainly not becuase it has made me who I am today. Would I do things differently? Maybe, but then if I did, would I be the same now? The answer to those questions depend on how one feels about themselves, how much they like themselves. Somedays, I do not like myself. Yet, I would not wish to change it, not deep in my heart. Only my self-pity would want it changed.